Beauty in the Vulnerable: waiting, studying and airplanes

oh wow. I keep writing blogs that begin with, "it's been awhile" ... That is unfortunate I know... the truth is writing has been hard to do lately. I really, really dislike vulnerability. Of course I believe that vulnerability can be a beautiful thing-but in specific times. In general, I like to feel safe, in control and tough, able to face another day. Lately though, I have not felt safe, in control or tough. I catch myself with tears rolling down my cheek, brought on by nothing. The stress of waiting on documents, the stress of waiting on God, the stress of... just trying not to stress...

I've never read a missionary's biography, at least none of the "famous" one's anyways, who haven't felt the torments of calling, purpose and vulnerability. Their memoirs are filled with pages of doubt, struggles, fears while being countered with the strong desire to please the Lord in whatever He is calling them to do.

So the point... I'm human. I struggle with being vulnerable. I don't enjoy weakness, but I have learned that in my weakness, He is strong.  And I've also learned that I'm pretty much always in a state of vulnerability because I'm never actually in control of my life, but the beauty of course is, that means God has got it under control, he is order, and he gives my life it's purpose.

Lately I have felt that God wants me to be more serious about language learning. Oh man.... Sitting around, studying the million ways to say one word, is not my cup of tea, but I know being able to communicate clearly and using the correct grammar is important. So I've been studying, and taking classes.
Me-Studying Ukrainian grammar! 

The hardest thing about being back in L'viv, is having this strong purpose placed on my heart, coming from the time I spent in Moldova, to feeling this loud whisper from God, to wait. "Wait Chelsey, now is the time for you to finally memorize those case endings..Soon you'll move on to phase two, but for now, focus on this...." Oh yea, and while you study, go help teach English to preschoolers:)

Then you add that with this crazy desire to visit "Home"... And  now you may begin to see why I am crying at random moments-laughs. I have to laugh at myself, because of course I would love to come to the states and see the people I miss, but then I start to think about the details that go into a trip back and my stress meter starts to rise... I know God is saying, "come on girl, get a grip, if I bring you to it, I will bring you through it"

With that, I am beginning to fund-raise for this trip back to the states. I have to say I am very much looking forward to a time of refreshment, and to be able to share all that God has placed on my heart with anyone who will listen;)Not to mention, I'm excited to eat some Chinese food and hear some good ole' hymns in church:)

Here is where I need YOU! You all are amazing. Every single one of you who help make my life and ministry overseas a reality! I am blessed to have you as friends and as my supporters! I hope that with this upcoming trip, you will rally around me to make this trip as meaningful as possible! I would love to share with your churches, Sunday school classes and small groups! The main goal of this trip will be to share my heart for Ukraine and Moldova, to grow the ministry, inviting more people to be a part of this journey, and to thank those who have made these past two years of ministry possible so far!

And if you are one of my supporters, rather in prayer or financially, I would love to thank you in person for the kindness you have shown me! So if you are willing to advocate on my behalf and talk with your groups/churches,setting up opportunities for me to share, or are interested in organizing fundraisers, I would be very grateful! For any inquires about how to set up a speaking engagement, or if you would like more information on the needs I might have while being the states, feel free to connect with me on Facebook or by email: radicalfeetministries@gmail.com... I know without you this will not be possible, so thank you all in advance for caring about me, and for caring about the success of this ministry!

So for now, I'm studying, singing preschool songs, guest teaching English classes, planning this trip for the states, and just praying with every fiber of my being that not my will but His alone be done through me, in me, and around me!


 *Exact dates will be posted once funds are in place to purchase the tickets! If you or anyone you know would be interested in helping make this trip possible, donations can be sent to Hands on Missions.  


 *As of this moment, dates are wide open and the time I will spend in the states will depend on the number of speaking engagements. My plans for now are to come Between Jan and March of 2014. If their are opportunities to speak within the holiday season, feel free to contact me, as dates can be adjusted, up until the the plane tickets are purchased. 


Thank you. 
Blessings,
Chelsey

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Sex Standing Up : Moldova Part 2

If you missed part one, please read it first: Part 1 Throughout my trip I was reading the book written by John Eldredge, entitled Beautiful Outlaw. If you've not read it, I would highly encourage you to do so. And I hope with this next sentence you will still read his book, and the rest of this blog for that matter. The title of this blog I questioned, but you are here reading this so it either hooked you in, or was in poor taste enough that either way you are here. In Eldredege’s book, he pokes fun at the joke, that I've heard many say about Baptist, you know the one, “ Why don’t Baptist have sex standing up? Because it would look too much like dancing.” Honestly I've never gotten the joke, cause I’m not sure a Baptist would talk about sex in public either, well at least not the good ole’ conservative southern Baptist. But this was the point, Christians in their various denominations get lost in their theology. They, I guess I should say ...
Read more

Serenity

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.  Today has been a bit of a struggle for me. I've been asking God why, which is never an encouraging way to spend the day. It all started with a little boy at the social orphanage. Last week, he was a little wild, so I just scooped him up, and held him in my lap, while Ed told the Bible Story. As we sat, this little boy just melted into my arms, sat quietly, and listened. So this week, as soon as I sat down in the classroom, he was climbing into my lap, and started to just talk to me.  He told me how everyone had gotten picked up this weekend and got to go home for the holiday Ukraine just celebrated. This social orphanage we go to, the kids live and go to school in one place. Their parents either are incarcerated, too poor to care for their child, or a single parent. Some people put their kids in this "school" so that they ca...
Read more

RIP

I  want to take the time to let you know how great Dr. K was. He has been a ministry partner with Hands on Missions for a really long time. His free medical clinic offered aid to thousand. He would make house calls (even to the missionaries in town) and give free medicine. Often he would visit our elderly neighbors, patiently listen to their every whim, as though he had all his day to offer sympathy. I left Ukraine for a couple years, and when I returned, I ran into Dr. K on the street. He genuinely took interest in how I was doing asking questions and encouraging me. Couple months ago my arm went numb and I was freaking out a little bit so I went to Dr. K for help. I was in pain and worried, and he looked at me and said, its okay, don't worry. And after a chiropractic session, I could feel my hand again. Did you know if it had not been for Dr. K my family would not be in Ukraine. My mom originally came to Ukraine in the 90's to do children's ministry outside ...
Read more